Box Office Round Up: Cowboys Win in Overtime

It was a close race, with the weekend estimates predicting a tie. But the actual results are coming in and Cowboys & Aliens just barely edged out Smurfs & Neil Patrick Harrises. The Cowboys wrangled in $36.4 million, while the Smurfs smurfed in just a little less with $35.6 million. While this may be a temporally win for Camp Favreau, C&A did nowhere near as expected after its huge $163 million budget and big marketing push. And the reports for the movie are all quite disheartening, as the movie apparently isn't a western, isn't Sci-Fi, isn't really much of anything. The only good thing about it is that it's easy on the eyes, thanks to the effects and Olivia Wilde.

Speaking of Miss Wilde, I just want to point out to my loyal readers that she really is Oscar Wilde's imaginary granddaughter. Olivia Jane Cockburn officially changed her last name to honor her fellow Irish author Oscar. Good thing she did too, or we will have never gotten what is perhaps the greatest red carpet interview ever.

Interviewer: Your original name was Cock-Burn. Lol, Cockburn. So did a lot of people in school make fun of the name Cockburn?
Olivia Wilde: (awkward silence) ... It's pronounced Co-Burn.     

On to Smurfs. No budget has been released yet, but seeing how it looks like a homemade Youtube video, they should be happy with $30+ million. That's twice as much as the similar(ly bad) Yogi Bear made its first weekend. It was also on fewer screens than C&A meaning to took in a better per-theater average. But what is good for the studios is bad for us, as this means we will probably get a Smurfs 2: Back 2 Tha Hood with even more forced urban references.

Captain America took a sharp fall to $25.5 million. But it is finally gaining some cash in the rest of the world with $53m of its worldwide $170m gross coming from markets that the movie completely neglects. It opens in Germany in three weeks, hopefully with an alternate ending where Red Skull wins. I wonder how it does there.

Harry Potter is still doing pretty good. Another $22 million US brings the worldwide total pass the Billion mark. It becomes the ninth movie ever to hit ten digits, and it only sits behind two James Camerons, two Pirates, one Lord of the Ring, one Toy Story, and, somehow, one Alice in Wonderland. Think it will catch Avatar? Think again, as Harry only needs to make another $1,773,400,000. Transformers 3 (8th with $6m US) should also pass the billion mark in a week or two.

Crazy Stupid Love was 5th with $19 million. Much like the movie itself, I can't think of anything witty to say.

Finally, Attack the Block didn't do much of anything as it was only on eight screens. Remember, this was set for a limited release, but got bumped up. Bumped up to eight screens. Neither math nor logic have ever been strong suits for Hollywood.

Opening This Weekend: Hope You Like Aliens

Cowboys &. Aliens -- James Bond, Han Solo, and Oscar Wilde's imaginary granddaughter star in this comic-book movie by the former Iron Man director. I'm not 100% sure on the plot, but I think it has to do with aliens fighting the Dallas Cowboys. That explains how Jerry Jones looks like he leads The Syndicate in X-Files.  This films had tons of hype leading up to its premiere at Comic-con. Then people actually saw it. The verdict: At least it looks good.

Attack The Block -- This had the opposite effect. It slowly built up hype until it exploded at Comic-con. The Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead) produced flick has aliens landing in a British ghetto, something that doesn't please the gangs too well. One of the gangs is led by Wright mainstay Nick Frost, meaning UK gangs are much more fun than US gangs. This has won multiple awards already, as has been called a cross between District 9 and Reservoir Dogs. Well it just won another award for "Weirdest Comparison Ever". This recently got bumped up from a limited release, but it still may be hard to find at your local theater.

The Smurfs -- KILL IT WITH FIRE! I guess Smurfs are kinda like aliens, and this movie does look more dangerous than a Xenomorph invasion. The most prominent preview for this film has one of the Smurfs constantly making a vuvuzela sound, and the other characters are saying how annoying he is. Let me repeat, they are selling this movie by a scene that is so annoying, the people in the movie can't stand it. Why does this movie exist? Are Smurf fans really that vocal? Did the film studios think Yogi Bear, Underdog, Astro Boy, and all those other films flopping was just a fluke? Did they even watch the old shows? What is up with Papa Smurf's voice? This probably won't even have the blatant sexism that made the old series such a classic.

Crazy, Stupid, Love -- The previews for this move have been playing for months now. I am really surprised it is just now coming out. Steve Carrell, Ryan Gosling, Julianne Moore, Emma Stone, Marisa Tomei, Kevin Bacon, and a few less important people fall in love. There's a little crazy involved, but mostly stupid. The critics seem to like this so far, so I guess lightning can strike twice for this same creative team who made Bad Santa.

The Fut Ure -- Yeah, it is really stylized like that. Miranda July writes, directs, and stars in a semi-autobiographical tale of a talking cat (played by July) who tells July (played by July) what to do with her life. Have fun discussing this one at Starbucks.

The Devil's Double -- It's about Uday Hussein's body double. I only like this because of an inside joke. Too long, don't care: We lost trivia night because my best friend wrote down Rob Zombie's The Double Rejects. So I would love to run this title by him. Too bad that won't happen. That trivia ended our friendship.

Life in a Day -- A "time capsule" of people around the world recording their everyday lives. On one hand, this is an interesting premise. On the other, this sounds like the most boring movie ever.

Thundercats -- HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Cartoon Network is premiering the new Thundercats cartoon Friday (in just an hour actually). It looks so good, it makes me want to go back to the 80s and relive my childhood. It's the opposite of Smurfs, which makes me want to go back to the 80s and dip all those Smurf toys into vats of Aquadots.

Opening This Weekend: Hung Over Pandas

This guy knows how to party!

The Hangover Part II -- aka Bridemaids for men. The comments here give me the impression most of you weren't a big fan of the first one. The Hangover was amazing. I've seen it maybe ten times now and I still laugh like crazy at it. Well the reviews are saying the sequel is exactly the Hangover Part I. I don't think that is a bad thing, but most people aren't enjoying it too much. Whatever, I'm still seeing it tonight. Impression then.

Kung-Fu Panda Part II -- Despite my love for kung-fu and pandas, I never saw the first one. It might be good, but I'm doubting it. The ads for the sequel are really well done however. Besides spoofing Paranormal Activity and Jackass, they are making an effort to show this does have the funny Seth Rogan and Danny McBride to go along with the unfunny one hit wonder Jack Black. Still, attendance so far is down very low so far, and it is already being called a bomb. Ouch.

The Tree of Life -- Sadly, this is not about the nine realms in Norse mythology. It's a period piece drama about growing up. Brad Pitt and Sean Penn (could have sworn he retired) star. This recently won the best in show Palme d'Or award at Cannes, which means it has nothing to do with loving Hitler.

Box Office Round Up: Fastest Fast Yet

Just a quickie today, and probably all this week. Yay Finals.

Fast Five was number one at the box office. No surprise there, but its gross is shocking. $83.6 million! That's $12M more than the previous best for the franchise, and a sure sign that 6 Fast 6 Furious is right around the corner. I would imagine speeding related deaths was also on the rise this weekend.

Unimaginative CGI throw-together #173452, also known as Rio, held on to second with a mere $14.4 million. That is about a SEVENTY-MILLION dollar drop out between first and second, which just has to be a record.

Rio is last week's news however (EDIT: make that two weeks ago), and it wasn't a good week for the rest of the new releases.

Prom was fifth with $5 million, 63% of its budget, while Hoodwinked 2 was sixth with $4 million, or 13% of its budget. And bringing up the pack is Dylan Dog: Dead of Night. While only on 875 screens (Fast Five was on 3600), Dylan Dog made a sad $885,000 -- good enough for 16th on the weekend. It definitely had a few dead nights.

New Releases for 4/29/2011

5 Fast 5 Furious

Just when the world didn't have enough stupid titles, here comes Fast Five. The previews say it's the best one yet, and I'll just have to take their word for it. Apparently, the Rock is the main character in this one, and there are spin-off plans with him in mind. Possibly a good idea. The Rock is a really talented, but poorly casted, actor. It's good to see him back in action movies (Walking Tall and the Rundown are great underrated flicks), and apparently Faster (somehow, not a Fast and the Furious spin-off) isn't too bad despite flopping at the box office.

Hoodwinked Too! Hood VS. Evil

Just when the world didn't have enough cookie cutter 3D CGI crapfests, here comes this. Apparently the first Hoodwinked (which came out way back in 2006. Five years is forever compared to most of these CGI cash-ins) was good. But it also had Anne Hathaway, who has gotten slightly more popular in that time.

Dylan Dog: Dead of Night

This doesn't look horrible, despite the bad reviews. The general consensus is it's a pale imitator to the comic book, but since the majority of America has never read the Italian comic, that shouldn't be a problem for most people. I'll reserve my judgment until I see it, but I can tell you for sure it isn't as good as the amazing Cemetery Man/Dellamorte Dellamore, the first Dylan Dog movie.

Prom

A Disney movie aimed at teens and Glee fans that was made for nothing. It's times like this when I cherish my Disney stock.

Cave of Forgotten Dreams

A 3D documentary by Warner Herzog that's probably opening on three screens at the most this weekend. Since those screens aren't anywhere around here, watch his appearance on the Boondocks instead.